Hi,

I don’t like quitting, and I don’t like leaving books unfinished. But I recently realised that every minute I spend struggling through a book is one I could spend enjoying a different one. So I’ve put down after getting no more than about halfway through it.

I found it a bit tiresome that by page 96 of a 220-page book, two of the four women who had any sort of significant mention had been sexually violated, and these violations were used primarily to illuminate the interior life of the male lead. To make it worse, this male lead was the perpetrator of the first sexual violation. *slams forehead into desk*

Sexual violence is upsetting. While I understand it’s a reality of the world we live in, I also vehemently believe that it should not be. Literature is about new visions of the world. I like my books to be expansive, boundless works of creative and moral imagination that propel my thoughts towards the elusive horizon of justice, freedom, and collective prosperity. After a lifetime of reading about women suffering violence of all kinds, I have no more patience or emotional bandwidth for books, or indeed any works of art, that present such violence without meaningfully or productively engaging with it. Reality can shove off.

Putting Coetzee’s book down made me think of a prize I just heard about this year that is "awarded to a novel in the thriller genre in which no woman is beaten, stalked, sexually exploited, raped or murdered". The Staunch Book Prize was established in 2018 after the #MeToo and #TimesUp movements put an unprecedented spotlight on sexual violence.

Its founder Bridget Lawless says: “We need more challenges to violence against women in fiction." I agree. We need more challenges to violence of all kinds because violence should not be normal. Unfortunately, in the world of Coetzee’s Disgrace, sexual violence is all too normal, so I don’t know that I will ever want to return to it. Still, I’ll keep the book somewhere in my library while I decide what to do with it. If there are any members in Lagos who don’t mind such content – the book received quite a lot of praise, so I imagine it can be an enjoyable read for someone who isn’t me – I’m happy to pass it along.

In the meantime, I’m making my Christmas wishlist, which is really just a small list of books I want (and which I hope will not disappoint me!). Three of the books on my list were recommended by Correspondent members, which pleases me probably more than it should. I don’t like to read reviews or choose books based on what’s won prizes, so personal recommendations are always a delight.

As I have gone on a bit of a tangent ever since reading I haven’t chosen a book of the month for our book club, since October. This isn’t an official book club selection, but I’d be delighted to have you read some of the books on my Christmas list along with me next year. I’ll let you know which ones I was able to find when they arrive, and you can let me know which of them are of interest to you.

I’ve kept the list short, since my stack of "books to be read" is already almost the same height as my very tall seven-year-old. I’ve also thrown in a work of fiction, because fiction is great and I want to read more of it.

Here are the five books that would be going in my Christmas stocking, if stuffing Christmas stockings were my thing:

Let me know what you think of this list in the contributions section. I’d also be very happy to receive more recommendations. Christmas only comes once a year, but I can be my own Santa whenever I want.

Till next time,

Greyscale cartoon image of OluTimehin Adegbeye, the Othering correspondent, on an orange background with a white envelope in the foreground. Want to receive my newsletter in your inbox? Follow my weekly newsletter to receive notes, thoughts, and questions on the topic of Othering and our shared humanity. Click here to subscribe to my newsletter.